Welcome to the new blog {and a birthday sneak-peek}!

20 Nov

I finally bit the bullet and decided to switch to a WordPress site for my blog (please note the new address)!  My reasons for doing this were basically to make blogging easier for me (I’m hoping to do it more as a result!), but I do hope you like the new spot!  And lest you think the new title is a pregnancy announcement or something (it’s not!), I chose it because I feel like it reflects what this season of life is teaching me about myself.  Motherhood has shown me, more than any other experience ever has (well, ok, marriage is a close second.) that I fall so very far from the standard I’d like to meet, and that there really is so much room to grow, if you will.

Before I became a mom, I knew for sure the kind of mom I’d be 🙂 I was sure that I’d thrive with motherhood as my vocation.  And yet the reality is that caring for two tiny people every day is really hard for me.  Don’t get me wrong, I love and cherish my children.  I am deeply grateful that I get to spend my days with them.  But these two babes show me my sin day in and day out, and there are plenty of times when it just ain’t pretty.  When I had Wade I discovered how desperately I wanted to be in control (of course I can train you to sleep through the night, little Wade, whenever I wish!).  After Holland’s birth and the subsequent continued shrinkage of my own free time, I’ve discovered how very selfish I am.  Really, I want to be a mom and spend time with my children, caring for them, but only when it’s convenient for me.

The honest truth is that I want to be a really impressive mom.  I want to enjoy my children, train them to love God and others, and weather the hard times with grace.  Let me just say that I do not do any of these things particularly well.  But do you know what I am learning?  I am slowly, slowly learning that my primary calling is not to be an awesome mom who trains her children well.  I am called to love God and find my greatest joy in Him and in the mere fact that He has loved me and has called me His own.  That thought does not bring my heart the kind of deep and lasting joy that it should.  I am too easily enticed by so many other things that seem promising.  I’m beginning to see that it’s out of His boundless grace and goodness to me that God is allowing me to see that motherhood ultimately cannot be the thing that fulfills me.  When I find my hope and joy in Christ, only then can motherhood (and any other thing, really) find its proper place.

So anyway, it’s my hope that the things I share here on this blog give a fairly accurate picture of this.  I’ll try to share more of my journey.  Sure, I’ll post pretty pictures and talk about fun things (and I’ll surely leave out some of the really ugly stuff that goes down), but I also hope you get a sense of the bigger things God is doing in me and in our family.  Thanks so much for reading!

And in case you’ve been counting, this one turned one last weekend!  More birthday pictures to come!


3 Responses to “Welcome to the new blog {and a birthday sneak-peek}!”

  1. shannon November 21, 2011 at 11:03 pm #

    You did it! YAY! I want to her more about the switch. LOVE this post–so gracefully worded. Preach it, sister. And, know that I am RIGHT THERE WITH YOU in this boat (rollercoaster?) of motherhood. Love y’all so! (You look like your mama in that last pic–so sweet!) xo

  2. Kristen November 22, 2011 at 7:04 pm #

    Yay for wordpress. I think you will really like it. 🙂
    And I am now subscribed… so I won’t miss a single update (since you’ll be posting more, right?!)

  3. rachel November 22, 2011 at 9:20 pm #

    Your new website looks wonderful!!! I loved this post. You speak so much through your faith. I think we need to trust God and love ourselves before we can be a good mommy and wife. And, I am subscribed too!! I can’t wait to see your new home.

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